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It turns out that the planet Earth is small?

universe scale diagram

It has been pointed out to me that I am an insignificant piece of shit (attention ladies: NOT NEWS) but just get a load of how insignificant, eh? David Deutsch figured out a way out of this, but I think the fact that I cannot understand his logic means that it does not apply to me. Fuck it, I’m going to go have a beer.


So long, rust bucket

space shutte atlantis Yesterday ended the last mission of the Space Shuttle Atlantis, the next to last mission ever in the shuttle program. Good riddance. Let’s call the space program what it is: expensive entertainment. Started out as a mental game with the Russians, but we’ve been space-BFF’s for decades, merrily sending useless junk into space at exorbitant prices (NASA’s budget since its inception, in 2010 dollars: $807 billion), for extremely limited real-world benefits.

The shuttle program is rather worse in terms of waste than the rest of what NASA does, though. It costs $1.3 billion per launch, making it more expensive per pound of stuff gotten into orbit than an old-school rocket. In addition, it can’t do a lot of what it was designed to do, is unsafe, and focuses our space program on manned missions into lower-earth orbit to the relative exclusion of everything else. Like, for example, giving money to actual science — the budget of the National Science Foundation over the lifetime of NASA has been less than a quarter of NASA’s.



This is quite possibly the most boring video you’ll see this week, except unless you listen carefully and notice that dude is saying, “it’s taken us kinda a long time, but finally we made life from scratch.”

by , posted May 24, 03:39 PM

The Swampmaster gets his arm chewed up by an alligator


Swampmaster Jeff Quattrocchi was bitten by an alligator during a show yesterday. He’s in the hospital. The Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission are holding the gator, and it’s unclear what will happen to it. Which sounds a little ominous, right? It’s one thing for a dog or a bear to bite a human — we ascribe some sort of moral agency to the former, and understand that the latter is at least likely to bite again.

It’s much less clear what it meant when, say Roy (from Siegfried and Roy) was mauled by that tiger. But an alligator? Lizard brain, man. The point of these shows is to antagonize the gator, at which point its basically trying to bite all the time. That gator was doing its job, and killing it would be sort of dumb.


Remember the time I stabbed four people?

This lady that looks like michael jackson stabbed four people

This lady that looks like Michael Jackson stabbed four people, including a lady (in the neck!) with a baby.

Bitch had two knives?!!

Nathan Lam Vuong is a super, awesome artist who is living in Los Angeles.


The street-cleaning robots are coming

italian street-cleaning robots

Robots, casually wandering the streets, is a staple of sci-fi movies, and with casual videoconferencing coming to the new iPhone, space tourism, and cyber warfare, the lack of street-cleaning robots has been an embarrassment. But no more, thanks to the Italians I’m sure a couple of children will be mauled by these things before the kinks are ironed out, but please, let’s deploy these on South Beach asap.


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