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The best part about the SOPA blackouts? Watching people on Twitter flip the hell out.

by , posted Jan 19, 11:53 AM


Mid to late January is good for one thing only: waiting for February, which itself is only good for contemplating suicide. So here are some links to take your mind off the fact that you’re not being showered in gifts and egg nog at the present moment.

  • Is it funny that I’m posting this on SOPA blackout day? I mean I think it’s funny that I’m posting this on SOPA blackout day. How to access Wikipedia on SOPA blackout day. Also: the R.I.A.A. is still staffed by total dicks (even when it isn’t SOPA blackout day).
  • Fake product reviews are the glue that hold internet comedy together.
  • Did not wearing a helmet save Gene Hackman’s life when he was hit by a car while cycling in Key West? Of course not, but assuming that helmets are the one-size-fits-all answer to bicycle safety only creates a false sense of security, argue the folks over at Lovely Bicycle.
  • Between the Republican Primary catfights and football, there have been a lot of non-story stories going around. To that end: Tim Tebow exists, and people write godawful crap about him.
  • Related, sort of not really: G.O.P.-Friendly Super PAC or Mary J. Blige Album?
  • The Story of my Life, bro.
  • Tax season is more or less upon us and yet again I seem to be the only person I know who actually does their own return. If you can add and you actually care about people, AARP is still accepting volunteer applications for their Tax-Aide program. I’ll be writing about my own experiences doing volunteer tax prep shortly.
  • I’m going to go on record and say that the last Magnetic Fields albums was farcically disappointing. “Oh you people like goofy pop songs? Well here’s 30 minutes of overproduced chamber music. Hope you like harpsichords!” Anyway, people seem to have high hopes for the next album Love At The Bottom Of The Sea, the first single for which is streaming online now. It features guys in drag and is woefully short. Fun!
  • In closing, someone needs to get Eddie Murphy and Dan Aykroyd on the phone.

by , posted Jan 18, 10:23 AM

In case you haven't heard about Time Piles, Dylan Romer explains his trippy new art app

dylan romer time piles

This was originally published on the Huffington Post Miami and the HuffPo Tech section. Read it again here!

Lets talk about it from Time Piles on Vimeo.

I love how I wrote this about Dylan and the first image on this video of the interview is me with my tongue out. Thanks, Dylan.

Buy Time Piles. Don’t suck.

For years, South Florida-bred artist and daytime software developer Dylan Romer ran around town with a laptop, a camcorder, and an XBox 360 controller. Armed with a BFA from FIU, an MFA from UF, and a homemade program, he created live psychedelic video art that screened at galleries around Miami. He captured events as they happened — people booty-dancing at shows, performance artists writhing, drummers pounding — and translated the images into choppy renderings of reorganized time. Through his program, the world looks like a moving collage of double exposed images.

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We love everything Bleeding Palm does over here at THL. We’re super creepy mega-fans, and that’s the honest truth. We like them better than we like ourselves. That is why I wrote up a post about their newest site on the Florida Turnpike for the Miami New Times. Make sure to click on it and poke around and appreciate Bleeding Palm’s sick mind(s).

by , posted Dec 16, 02:16 PM


The story of Pinochle written by KT Kieltyka for The Hairpin reminds me so much of my own delusional yet magic filled youth. I can’t even begin to tell you the things I believed for too long. I hope I have kids one day that trust the lies I tell them till they’re in middle school. Life’s too short. Enjoy.

by , posted Dec 15, 05:19 PM


The Miami New Times’ annual People Issue will probably be stacked in green metal boxes all over town by tomorrow, but today, it’s up online. Read about Jimbo Luznar of Jimbo’s, activist Vanessa Brito, and Oba Ernesto Pichardo. I mention them in particular because they’re interesting people, and, of course, because I wrote those. Enjoy!

by , posted Nov 22, 04:16 PM


If you watch just one minute of Patrick Swazye at a disco with a PBR today, make this that minute.

by , posted Nov 13, 07:00 PM

On The Fence Podcast with Alesh, Steve, and Misael

On The Fence episode 2

Hey everybody! Long time no see. I wanted to let you know about On The Fence, a podcast I’ve been doing for the past few weeks with Steve. Basically, we shoot the breeze about whatever’s going on in the world. Posted on Friday was yet another episode about the #Occupy movement, with Misael Soto on board for a first-person perspective. And there’s a new episode coming soon. As in tomorrow. Subscribe it in your iTunes, add it to your Google-plus-one, like it on Facebook, and retweet it to your followage.



It’s been said before but it bears repeating: modern Journalism needs to stop screwing itself.

by , posted Oct 31, 07:50 PM


Yeah you’ve already seen this by now, but I really didn’t expect a picture I took at a costume party last week to wind up on it. By the way, the answer is more or less “both.”

by , posted Oct 28, 09:23 PM

Liz and Jessica Romp in Filth

Our own Liz and Jessica wander through some muck as part of New Times new interview series Disgusting.

I’m not so much disgusted as I am confused, but this is more or less normal.


Unrequited crushes

subway crush

We all have unrequited crushes
be they half-asleep
or mostly dead criminals,
these hunky finds will keep hope alive for the phrase “I don’t have a type.”



Here are two wonderful links for the day.
Musical goddess Kate Bush’s new album 50 Words for Snow is coming out on November 21 and her single “Wild Man” hit the web. It’s dedicated to the mythical beast bigfoot, of course. Listen here.

Another artist that I wish were my pal Manu Chao held a concert in Arizona and kinda almost met with America’s douchiest sheriff. An article on the event begins: The stage was set for an impromptu public debate on Arizona’s immigrationpolicies when Sheriff Joe Arpaio stepped out for a sandwich Tuesday afternoon, Sept. 20, and found a press conference assembled just outside his office to call attention to Manu Chao’s appearance at Festival de Resistencia.
Read the full story here

by , posted Oct 10, 03:33 PM

Macs I Have Known and Loved
In Honor of Mr. Jobs

This was my first computer. Its single-button mouse made a lovely deep clicking noise and its disk drive made the most delicious racket. While IBM’s had those little buttons you used to eject a diskette, Mac’s mounted floppies upon insertion (insert juvenile giggling). The motors used to eject a 3.5 inch floppy varied over the years – later models sounded smoother and dare I say more futuristic. This though? Something akin to a Transformer opening up on your desk.

I would spend most of my time playing Shufflepuck or Glider, doodling in Clarisworks, or designing new desktop patterns. I did very little that could be considered structured or productive. I loved every minute of it.

It was one of the first color macs but it was such a piece of crap that the only software that would run on it was usually in grayscale. I was 11. It never broke. It was not the best computer, but it was my first computer and the best friend a socially awkward pre-teen could have. Thank you Mr. Jobs for making it possible and read on for the ensuing 20 years.

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by , posted Sep 29, 09:17 AM

What's The Deal With All the Kindles?

I just read your e-mail lol

So Amazon introduced 3 new Kindles that as of writing are being offered alongside now-discounted existing models. This means they now have 7 versions (counting the DX) of the Kindle currently on the market – three with keyboards, three with touchscreens, and one with a little toggle switch, a few buttons and little else.

If one is to believe the gadget media, these things are basically the second coming. There’s a really cheap e-reader now! Except if you want it without ads it’ll be an extra $30, jacking up the price by 40%. But forget that – There’s an iPad competitor that does Flash! Except in order to function properly, it needs to pass all data through Amazon’s cloud servers. These servers will gently massage your websites for you in preparation for delivery into your Fire’s waiting maw, not unlike a mother penguin regurgitating fish for it’s young.

The above mental image aside, doesn’t this strike anyone else as weird? Amazon is taking data from a website, making cliff notes, then passing you these cliff notes. Not only that, but it’s keeping a copy of these notes for the purposes of predicting what website you’ll be going to next. People flipped out over Facebook’s privacy but not this?

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The Heat Lightning won Editor’s Choice for CBS Miami’s Most Valuable Blogger Awards 2011!

by , posted Sep 26, 12:47 PM


As a follow up to my post on the ridiculous men’s products available out there today, allow me to present a concise source of random, very useful tools: Kevin Kelly’s Cool Tools. If you’re in the market for anything, be it the best way to brew coffee to an ax (or even a book on how to properly use an ax) this site has got you covered.

by , posted Sep 6, 11:12 AM

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