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Doonesbury – April 5th, 2015. Somehow this has only gotten worse.

  • Two dolphin species form alliance and have sexytimes. It’s like an oceanographic key party out there.
  • ‘Why I Deleted Your Band’s Promo Email’ – via The Morning News
  • Cosby’s people seem to be confusing ‘proof of criminal activity’ with ‘proof of being a sociopathic predatory skeezwad.’ What I love most about this is that there’s really no need to editorialize the statements here – they’re so plainly indefensible that only someone getting paid an insane amount of money by said skeezwad could defend them.
  • The theme of this week’s news seems to be “assholes who won’t shut up.” I don’t have a link for this as I’m going back to pretending Donald Trump doesn’t exist.
  • The last time I was in San Francisco I got kicked out of a bar in the mission in the early evening. As I walked down the street giggling drunkenly with friends, a lesbian couple glared at us as they were taking out their recycling. One was wearing a jeweled bindi on her forehead and a look of utter disgust on her emaciated, presumably vegan face. I have never felt more despised and cared less about it. Anyway San Francisco is where good ideas go to die and is more than a little fucked.
  • In closing I worked real real hard on this mix and you should listen to it, dammit.

by , posted 5 days ago

THL Mix Summer 2015 - Featuring new tracks from Tame Impala, Ratatat and More!

The Heat Lighting – Summer 2015 Mix by John S. on Mixcloud

Fancy a little weekend music? Featuring Plaid, Boxed In, Tame Impala, Ratatat, Beat Spacek, Michna, Chrome Sparks AND MORE.

Full track listing after the jump.

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Being single and poor: a link list

  • I get what this NY Times article is saying about being romantically involved with someone uncute, but I still want to be the ugly one in my relationships. (Maybe this is why I’m single?)
  • Congrats to Lindy West on her marriage. She looked beautiful in the photos. I have to say that you don’t have to have ever been properly “fat” to relate to this nonsense: “I’ve dated men who relished me in private but refused to be seen with me on the street, or who told me, explicitly, that we had no serious future because they were afraid their friends would laugh at them.” Men are just despicable generally. (No, wait. This is why I’m still single.) Also, I’m both offended and now hungry thanks to the hot dog ad in the middle of this article. WTF?
  • I don’t have time to read this Tim and Eric interview, but you should. Then tell me about it after.
  • Finally, researchers have taken on the heavy (or unfortunately light) topic of what makes a wiener attractive.
  • This is why you’re poor, your mama was poor, and your kids’ll be poor: “‘Following your dreams is dangerous,’ a 31-year-old woman who runs in social entrepreneurship circles in New York, and asked not to be named, told Quartz. ‘This whole bulk of the population is being seduced into thinking that they can just go out and pursue their dream anytime, but it’s not true.’”

 

Goddammit Tallahassee

Tallahassee is so close to being great as to be unbelievably irritating. Like a mistake in an otherwise beautiful painting you can’t take your eyes off of.

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Michna - Solid Gold (feat. MNDR)

Michna – Solid Gold (feat. MNDR) from DaBrainkilla on Vimeo.

Trip your way into your weekend.

 

Reading Joan Didion's Miami On The Eve Of Normalization Of Cuban-American Relations

Listen – I can’t pretend to be an expert on any of this. I can though share some things from having grown up in it.

I was 6 when this book came out and living in Coconut Grove. The events Didion describes form a partial background of my upbringing, but in the way they do for a child who knows something is happening but cannot frame it against anything else due to inexperience and naivete. I knew vaguely that things were going on but didn’t know specifically what, and my parents weren’t in any hurry to explain how the city they moved to 15 years ago was not the city it was today.

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Because Lana Del Ray is still a sorta sad about … things.

I swear I’ll have your money content tomorrow.

by , posted 14 days ago

Flush Your Workweek Goodbye

As we stumble madly into this weekend, Drew from Toothpaste For Dinner and The Worst Things For Sale would like to remind you that not only is the American Standard 2889.216.020 Toilet extremely efficient at flushing waste, it also has the most spectacularly ridiculous marketing videos known to man.

Flush on, you crazy diamond. Flush on into that weekend.

 

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I don’t want to ruin anything about the most recent Comedians In Cars Getting Coffee but Stephen Colbert quotes a Neutral Milk Hotel song at length and Jerry just can’t handle it and it’s kind of the best.

by , posted 19 days ago

Fox's - Where I Learned How To Drink

“Fox’s? You’re going THERE?” my Dad would say. He was a professor at the University of Miami and always thought of Fox’s as a seedy poorly lit dump.

Which of course it kind of was – but it was ours, dammit.

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Good-bye, Fox's Sherron Inn, the Best Bar That Will Soon Fall to Pieces

(Press play before you read.)

I took my dad to Fox’s Sherron Inn this Father’s Day. It was 5:30 p.m. and the South Miami restaurant was dark, as usual, and cool. It was also empty. It felt like time paused and something erased all the other people in the world. Where did everyone go?

It’s almost the same as when I was growing up. The bar’s now larger, there’s a front patio instead of a curb to sit on, the back rooms are “nicer,” and that ceramic fox is gone. Remember the fox someone stole? I think I know who did it.

I read on Matthew Andrews’ Facebook earlier that this, one the oldest running establishments in town, is closing at the end of this month and the building will be torn down. His family owned it for decades. Remember when he was always there, and, dude, we were all always there. It was like being a kid and your cousins are kids and you all buzz around your grandparents’ house. And then you get to high school and you only stop in now and again. And then your grandparents die, and you can’t ever go back. We’re at that moment.

The best thing about Fox’s was always Patsy Cline on the juke box. Then the 2-4-1 happy hour special that got you so stupid drunk, you ended up crying to “Crazy” and playing it back to back. Then there were the conversations with the old regulars. Boat guys. One was my favorite. He lived with his mom, wore polos with shorts. He was in his 50s, and he liked to talk music. And that airplane painting on the wall — it’s unbeatable. It makes me feel like it’s OK to love where you’re at but also dream about being on your way to someplace different.

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Hump Day Post Holiday Full Week Hangover Links


“I’m so lonely” – via

Because the long weekend was too short.

Apologies for leaning so hard on Boing Boing this week – there was just too much good weird news to pass up.

 

Marvin Gaye sings the Star Spangled Banner

I’ve tried to post this somewhere every year around this time. Imagine my apprehension this year when I couldn’t find it on YouTube?! (There’s a version of Marvin Gaye doing the Star Spangled Banner on there, but it’s a completely straight version, sans mirrorshades. Whatev.) Anyway! DailyMotion to the rescue or whatever. I’ll be downloading this one so I don’t have any trouble when it gets pulled off the internet for good by mouth-breathing kunckle draggers.

 

4th of July Short Week Links

Because Freedom incoming.

 

Here Are Some Super Repetitive Songs Because It's Monday And We Can't Think

Rules: nothing featuring vocal samples otherwise everything on this list would just be Daft Punk.

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WVUM alum and Ghostly International recording artist Michna nee Egg Foo Young done made you a playlist. Give it a listen.

by , posted 30 days ago

Let's make a social network

Awhile ago I was shooting the breeze with John and Liz and I asked them for ideas for making a social network. I’d been messing around with web programming and I wanted a project. I don’t really remember what they said, but it was a lot of thoughtful constructive ways that Facebook could be improved (these conversations of course are all happening on Facebook at the time, not like now when we have our custom Sharepoint implementation up and running) and whatnot.

Now you’re thinking, but wait: improving and adding features is not how social networks get built these days! All the social networks created since FB are different because of the features they lose, right? Twitter is messaging, but only up to 140 characters. Snapchat only does one thing (I’m not sure what that one thing is, and I guess also now it’s a news portal, so maybe forget about that one as an example). Instagram is basically like Facebook, but it removes everything but photos. The most recent and extreme examples are Yo, which removed everything but one predefined message you could send. Then there’s Secret and Yik Yak, which are like Twitter but without the user accounts. I’ve heard that there’s an Instagram-like photo sharing tool for doctors to share photos of their patient’s weird medical things? Each of these things is great in its own way, and impossible to explain to someone who hasn’t used it.

So that’s my question: what’s your idea for a simple social network that might or might not be interesting? I’m not a savage, so I’m not going to tell you to leave a comment. Post it to Facebook, of course.

 

A Birthday Manifesto

I am a thirtysomething questionably professional man living in New York City. I do not consider myself a social butterfly or as having a particularly special or exciting personal life.

Regardless it has gotten to the point where even meeting a group of friends at a bar requires a minimum of 15 emails juggling no fewer than 3 proposed dates. I have friends that have kids, friends that are planning on having kids shortly, friends that are working frantically so they can afford somewhere into which they can place children, and people who are just generally so busy at work or with vaguely work-like engagements for which they don’t get paid (networking? Is that what this is called?) that they can’t ever do anything with real friends.

I realize I’m not the only one with these ‘problems’ (specifically white people and first world) but generally they are not really that hard to deal with. That is, except when it comes to birthdays.

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